Thursday, July 21, 2011

BikrGürl continued...

I'm sorry I had to end the last blog entry quickly. We went to barbecue at one of Victor's co-workers houses. It and...wait for it...pork!!!! There was also Hähnchen, or chicken, and garlic bread on baguettes. And wine. And vegetables, but I'm still nervous about, you know...E-coli. This party is another whole post.

So, back to the bike...

A bit more scenery...

I call this the Jesus Christ boat.

The sign says, "I am the light of the world...Jesus Christ". By the way, I have yet to see a Catholic church here. Actually, I've only seen one church. I haven't seen any schools either.

Did I mention it was pouring? That's why the backgr
ound is gray.

Some lovely buildings. They have so much character.

I lost the bike path somehow. No worries. More houses to look at. Yay!

However, where did that path go?

I found myself on a narrow street, so I hopped up on the sidewalk. The sidewalk on this side of the road was about as wide as a doorway. So I drove ca
refully. Don't-fall-don't-fall-don't-fall-shit-there's-a-car-this-would-be-a-bad-time-to-fall...

Yep. Crashed. The car slammed on the brakes. I tried to fall safely. I think I removed the fingerprints from my hand trying to hang onto the sidewalk instead of falling into the road. It didn't work.

I thought, "At least I have my license on me. They
can ID the body".

I landed, did a quick inventory, decided I would li
ve, and jumped up, pulled up the bike, and scooted to the side.

The car did not even check to see if I needed help or was OK! In fact, I swear I could almost hear the tires squeal!

There were no other witnesses. This was good, be
cause I mounted the bike and started riding. And the seat had turned sideways. I probably looked pretty dumb.

Anyway, I was a bit shaken, but I forged on (after fixing the bike seat). I
just needed to find the river and get back on that damned path.

I drove into an industrial area. Concrete factory or something. I kept going. Eventually, I got behind some sort of business/industry and was at
a dead end. Or an alternate universe.

First I saw this:

Well how 'bout that. I didn't know that the Oscar statues were made in Germany.

In my peripheral vision I saw something else...odd. I turned to see this:

The only thing that could have made this enormous head freakier is if it were attached to an enormous naked body.

If that wasn't bad horror movie...out of the corner I my eye...

Can you hear the horror movie stabbing scene music in your head? Because I did.

Eventually, I got myself good and lost. I did come across a beautiful garden center, but that's another blog.

I was getting pretty nervous about how in the world I would find my way back. But then I relaxed. I'd just get in a taxi and have the cabbie take me and the bike back to "4 Eisenstradgje: Alexander Pushkin Platz". At least Victor was careful to teach me how to say the address when I got here.

Then I relaxed and eventually found my way back.

Here was a random sighting:

Yep, a horse grazing. In a patch of overgrown grass on the edge of the river. In the middle of the city. No house, no barn, no owner nearby. Okie-dokie.

Now, cue the Darth Vader theme:

Poor Angela Merkel, Chancellor of Germany (like the President).

Oh, speaking of President, I found myself defending President Obama by asserting that he doesn't dye his hair black! The BBQ people insisted that he has gray hair and he dyes it. Of all the foreign policy discussions! This is the American government issue they want to discuss?

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